[Jamie doesn't bother to answer -- everything he wants to say, he'd rather say in person. He throws himself into finishing off anything that might be asked of him instead, making sure that as soon as possible after the clock strikes, he can be let off.
It's a jittery ride home, followed by a brief jog from the bus stop down the street. Jamie's a little disheveled by the time he lets himself in, work clothes in disarray from his impatient fidgeting -- tie hanging loose instead of fully undone, cuffs unbuttoned, collar half-up and half-down. He doesn't really care enough to fix it, or even to immediately go to change the way he normally would, seeking out Max instead to get his arms around him, words falling out quick and certain:] Hi. I love you.
[Standing in the kitchen with a cup of coffee in his hand, Max turns the second the door opens. He's torn between moving and staying where he is. It's always a joy to watch Jamie come through the door of their apartment. Max stopped thinking of it as his immediately after he asked Jamie to start staying there. It took a little while before Max got Jamie to realize that he meant that he wanted him there permanently, but it was still so early in their relationship that Max didn't want to say too much-- but once he realized that it wasn't too much, he was as insistent as he dared to be.
Now, there was no hesitance at all. This was their apartment, and there should never be a reason why Jamie didn't feel comfortable coming home to him.
Seeing Jamie so flushed and what looked like.. picked apart had Max changing his opinion about standing. He started to move and made it to the other side of the counter before he was in Jamie's arms, hands instantly tugging at his shirt so his fingers could rest against his lover's flesh. ]
Hey there. I love you too, so fucking much. I love you. I love you. I love you. I don't know why I was so scared to say it, but I do. I have, and I will.
[He laughs quietly, pure happiness, tugging Max into a soft, quick kiss.] I don't know. I thought it was too fast? Or -- I don't know.
[That it was too much, coming from him. That he wasn't going to be enough. Max has been so good, so kind, so clear about how much he cares, but some things go deeper than that. Jamie's used to bending over backwards for people and still being told it's not enough. And what has he done for Max? What could he do for Max, who has things so much more together than Jamie can ever imagine being despite having a hundred more reasons not to?
But none of that matters. Max has opened his home and his heart and shared all his secrets. It's hard to keep wondering for long. Jamie might worry about being worth it, but he doesn't have any doubts about it being true.]
But I love you. Fuck, I really, really love you. [He's almost breathless with in, one hand on Max's cheek, the other against his back, holding him in close.]
I didn't want to lose you. I'm always so scared that I'll do something wrong and lose you. That I'll feel too much, that I'll need you too much and you'll realize it and leave.
[Because that's what it boils down to. There's a visceral need. It's something beyond natural and human that's basic and feral almost, that boils down Max's need and desire to be with Jamie to an almost unhealthy degree. He feels it in his bones, through his blood and body. It makes him ache to always touch, to be close and the actual desire he feels consumes him like nothing else. It's a cracking electricity that runs through him, a force he wishes he knew how to control, but doesn't want to all the same.
This is why Max is worried his love will consume Jamie. He doesn't understand it himself, but he knows that he'd shatter without the young man already. Jamie is worth it all to Max and there's nothing Max wouldn't do or give for him.
Max moves his hands along Jamie's back and sides and places one hand over his heart. ]
I want you to feel my love. I want you to know. I was going to wait until we were having sex one day, but this- I want you to know how much, how deep I need you, what this is inside me.
Never. Nothing could make me leave, not if I have the choice.
[If he's waiting for any fear or hesitance, Max won't find it. Jamie's expression is open, eager, a hand dropping to cover Max's and hold it against his chest. He's not afraid of the idea of being needed too much. It doesn't feel possible, at this point. Imagining a life without Max has quickly become, if not impossible, then too painful to let himself linger on. Being needed just means Max will stay.]
Please. [The sheer want in Jamie's voice is unmistakable, longing and hopeful. He smiles at Max, leaning in to rest his forehead against the other's.] I want it too, baby. I want to feel everything I can from you.
[Wanting this to be intimate and knowing that it will be powerful and full of energy for them both, Max takes a moment to remove both their shirts. He pulls Jamie back to the bedroom and smiles softly as he brings him to their bed. It's easier to experience this the first time when the focus isn't split.
Max hasn't let go of Jamie's hands or body the entire time they've moved-- he hasn't broken eye contact either. Even with the tide-like inundations he knows that Jamie will experience, he's feeling increasingly secure in what they have. ]
You have all the choice, and I will never push you away. I will renew this mark as often as you want to keep you connected to me. It lasts about a week but will begin to fade after a few days. My emotions won't be as strong after a little while, but if we continually renew it, you will begin to sense what I feel almost all the time. It will be a bond between us. I can detect you, too, but not as strongly unless we are being intimate. It's ... a lot while we are having sex. That's the best I can describe it until you feel it yourself. I mean, imagine both our orgasms at once, along with all our feelings. I want you to realize what you're getting. I want this with you, want it so much, but I need you to make sure.
[There's a sureness in Max's tone. He knows that Jamie wants this, but it's his entire being that he's giving, and Max has done this before and has been burned so badly. He knows that Jamie isn't like that, but he also wants to give Jamie an understanding of how much he will feel because Max hasn't felt this way in so long, and once they are joined, Max will love even more deeply. They both will because they will feel their wills combine. ]
[He doesn't take his eyes off Max for a moment, not as he's led back to the bedroom or as he settles onto their bed. Not while he explains. Jamie listens carefully, taking it all in, his expression open and thoughtful as he does. For all that Max feels like he needs to insist, Jamie wonders if maybe he should reconsider, if he should at least be nervous -- but there's still no hesitance. Max wouldn't do something to hurt him. And the idea of being wrapped up together so thoroughly, bound together like that--
It only takes him a moment of consideration to answer, and even that's only because it feels like it should.]
I'm sure. I promise.
[There's so much trust in the way he's looking at Max. Jamie runs a hand down his arm, his side, trying to soothe away any concern that might be there.]
Being connected to you -- I don't think I've ever wanted anything more than that.
[No matter how much Max works to explain, check, and double-check-- he wants this. He desires this bond with Jamie more than he has words for, which is why. He won't have to always speak his words. The bond does that for them. The emotions, the deep need that Max has -- the very depth of Max's soul will be felt, and he won't have to explain all of his desires, the dark ones, the ones he's scared to ever speak of. He won't have to tell Jamie how he feels about them being two halves of a whole and about how, at times, he already wishes they could bind their bodies together somehow so that they'll never have to part. It's love to a frightening degree, but he's willing to share it.
Taking a deep breath, Max nods and quietly places his hand on Jamie's chest over his heart. Closing his eyes, his hand glows red briefly, and then suddenly Jamie will feel the flood of Max's emotions, a tidal wave of everything he's feeling. The dangerous, overwhelming desire, want, need, possessive, and slightly obsessive nature of his love. He will know exactly how deeply Max feels. It's a never-ending well of emotion, a powerful, soul-wrenching, almost painful love that Max has no idea how to keep a lid on. It's beautiful and terrible all at once. It's powerful, and his hand will leave behind a irradescent mark that will tie them together.
After the initial wash, the intensity will mute into something more natural if Jamie allows it to if he accepts what Max feels. When Max's eyes flutter open, there's a slight fear in them, knowing that Jamie can feel all he does. Something about being who he is has made his true love like this. Although this is the first time he's fallen this deeply, he thinks. That, too, can be felt -- everything that Max feels, Jamie will know now. Pain and joy, fear, trepidation, happiness, love, all of it is for Jamie to know. Max holds no more secrets between them. ]
[It is maybe the most intense thing Jamie's ever had happen to him, to go from nothing but his own thoughts to suddenly having every one of Max's feelings flooding through him. He'd swear he can feel it in every inch of him, head to toe. Like he's being invaded -- even as it feels like he's the one doing the invading, shining a light on every one of Max's emotions and leaving him no room to hide. For the first few moments he can't even tell the difference, where his own love and desire and admiration ends and where Max's begins, whose eagerness it is to have this tie between them. Does it even matter anymore? Everything Jamie is belongs to Max already, has since the first time Max kissed him, if not before then. Everything Max is, is part of him now.
It's overwhelming, but Jamie's still not scared in the slightest. He could get addicted to this rush of emotion, this complete openness. Wishes he could reach out and show Max a mirror into his own mind, just to truly, completely melt them together.
He's not sure when his eyes have drifted closed, too busy sorting through what's happening in his own head to pay attention. The only outside stimuli that gets through is Max's hand against his skin, Max's voice when he speaks. It doesn't matter. He doesn't have to see that little tremor of fear; he can feel it in his own chest.
Jamie doesn't bother to open his eyes, not immediately, and he doesn't have the words to explain exactly how it feels. He reaches out, instead, hands finding Max as instinctively as a compass finds north, tugging him in close so Jamie can kiss him instead, try to pour all the love and all the desire he's feeling into it, desperate to try to show him the only way he knows.]
I love you. [It's breathless, awed, murmured almost still against Max's mouth.] I love you, I love you -- thank you.
[The bond isn't completely one way. There's enough between them that when they're this close, Max can also feel echoes of Jamie's emotions. It only grows when Jamie finds him and tugs him in to kiss. The kiss opens the floodgates between them, offering Max insight into Jamie's emotions. The more intimate they grow, the more Max will feel. It's like following an echo to the source, where the voice becomes clear as day, and Max knows every corner of Jamie as well as himself. It's a slower revelation, but it's what Max wants as deeply as he wants to share himself with Jamie.
His hands run along Jamie's chest and upward into his hair, tugging at it lightly as they kiss. He can feel the chords of their passion beating out a unique and gorgeous tune that only they could make together. It all begins to make sense to him: the need, the passion. They share it, and while Max still doesn't know if what he feels is comfortable. He can't stop himself. His need is complete, and it's all-consuming. Knowing that Jamie can feel everything makes it easier -- Max doesn't have to speak. He knows his movements are understood, and the flames of his desire are known.
Even the fact that he's beginning to feel what Jamie does is echoed in his emotions. It's like a never-ending cycle that curls through them both, only adding to the intensity they feel together. ]
I love you too, I love you, want you, need you. You are my home, my everything. Thank you!
[Biting at Jamie's lower lip, Max lingers over the taste of copper that he uncovers. It's a taste of Jamie's soul, of something forbidden that he shouldn't enjoy, and he knows it. If Jamie wants to complain, he'd understand. He'd feel it and know that it wouldn't be acceptable. He'd know that Jamie wouldn't want the same in return. Max has needs that want to take and give all at once, he could swallow down Jamie whole somehow. Take his being, and drink it, bathe in it, live in it. It's about being together and being one like this that drives Max to the extreme of his emotions. He loves to the very corners of his mind, soul and body. ]
[He makes a quiet noise when Max bites down, a little groan, needy and overwhelmed and not at all unhappy. Jamie feels a little dizzy from all of this, but it's not in a bad way. More like an endorphin rush settling in -- runner's high, he thinks distantly to himself, a little bubble of laughter half-trapped in his throat, silly and giddy.
He's never felt this wanted before. He's never wanted anyone this way before. He feels drunk on it.]
You're mine, too. [Another kiss, deep and desperate.] My whole world. You've got me.
[Jamie says it like it's an offering, means it like one. He'd give Max anything he wanted, he'd do anything he was asked. If Max wants to devour him, that's okay -- Jamie wants to be consumed just as much.]
[Feeling the needy rush from Jamie, Max allows himself the fulfillment that little flavor brings him and rolls it across his tongue and into Jamie's mouth. He knicks his lip to share a mixture of their joined tastes, their unfettered essences. It's pure arousal for Max, kissing Jamie deeply and knowing the way Jamie loves him is similar to his all-consuming nature.
His hands wander Jamie's perfect dancer form, carving beautiful lines with his digits across the planes of his chest and along his abdomen. Then he moves back up to trace the handprint he left delicately. Then, without much thought, Max bows down to trace it with his tongue. ]
I will always be yours.
[He looks up from where he is and continues to move down slowly. His mouth pays testament to the perfectly honed definition of Jamie's abs, running his tongue back and forth in long stripes until Max reaches the area right above Jamie's pants. He sucks up a bit of skin and bites down around it, pulling it up deep into his mouth. He'd swallow it down whole if he could. He almost does but then releases it to a dark mark and a long groan. ]
[Jamie is already breathless just from that sweeping touch against his skin. It's insane how quickly it feels like everything builds with Max's arousal feeding into his own; he's squirming in moments, hard and aching from the first touch of Max's mouth to his skin, heart thundering and stomach flipping pleasantly under the attention. He buries his fingers in Max's hair, tightening when he bites down.
The mark sends a little spike of heat through him, always does. It would be embarrassing knowing how laid bare Jamie's wants are, that Max is seeing how desperately he loves that feeling of being claimed and owned that those marks give him -- except feeling Max's possessiveness for himself tells Jamie that he has nothing to feel ashamed about.]
Please-- [It comes out as a helpless little moan, and he swallows, one hand dropping to Max's shoulder just to sweep over whatever of his skin Jamie can reach, running down over his arm.] I love you, please. Whatever you want.
[Like a building tsunami, Max is inundated with his growing needs and Jamie's. He no longer feels shame over his desire to taste and bury himself in the other man. His thirst to possess Jamie thoroughly is tempered by Jamie's need and desire to be needed in such a desperate way. In return, Max feels an equal need to be wanted and thirsted for. He, too, wants to be taken and torn asunder eventually-- but that can come later. It doesn't matter when. It's a burning cycle between them that is no longer hidden.
Lapping over the small trail that leads directly to Jamie's cock, Max quickly undoes Jamie's button and zipper so that he can mouth along his beloved's thick cock. It makes his body throb with need and burn with pleasure all at once as he feels the pleasure and needs flood through Jamie at his touch.]
Oh Fuck, you're wonderful.
[Pulling off the rest of Jamie's clothes, Max quickly lays him bare. He takes a moment to climb back up his body to kiss him full and hard on the mouth. The kiss is full of tongue, a dirty, thrusting mess that's half in his mouth and half out. Rubbing his body up against Jamie's, Max groans. Even though he's still half-clothed, he can feel Jamie's cock against his stomach and can't wait to fulfill the ache he has to taste every bit of him. ]
[It's a strong enough feeling that Jamie's shivering with it a little, kicking aside his clothes as quickly as he can manage, eager for the feel of Max against as much of his skin as he can manage. Desperate for it, a frenzied urge that feels like it's never going to be sated. Every touch just makes him want more.
He arches up into Max, kisses him with a fervor, mouth opening immediately under his. One hand settles at Max's shoulder, a leg hitching up around his waist. Jamie arches up into him, simply seeking friction for a moment before he shifts, moving with a sudden and playful instinct to flip the both of them over, straddling Max's hips as he presses him down into the mattress. He bends down to kiss him again, biting at Max's lip, hands all over his chest, reverential in his touches. It doesn't matter that he knows Max can feel all that Jamie feels for him -- it doesn't stop him from wanting to show him how much he's loved, too.]
[There's surprise on Max's face, and a slight rumble in his throat. He'd been ready to do some serious devouring, and now he's laid flat on his back with a beautiful man, naked and squirming above him. The fierceness of his desire is tempered slightly. The carnal animalistic nature tempered by the way they're positioned now. Max is slightly at the whim of Jamie's want and desire-- and he doesn't mind it at all. Swallowing down his own thoughts, he shifts and slides his hands along Jamie's body, nails raking over the younger male's back while they kiss. ]
Jesus, you are so fucking gorgeous. How did I manage you?
[Still wearing pants, he can't find the exact friction he seeks, but that doesn't keep him from rolling his hips up toward Jamie. There's always that impending sensation coming that will echo his action from Jamie's body. It's a wealth of information and exploding friction in his brain from every touch, every nip and pull between them. It's nothing he's felt in years-- and never to this degree.
Moans and low growls merely exist in the room like they were pulled from the corners, the ceiling, the bed themselves as they travel from Max and reverberate around. He's far from silent about how he feels. There's an ache that continues to pulse and drive Max upward until he's captured Jamie's mouth in a long, biting kiss, sitting up-- his arms around Jamie, clinging to every inch of him as they devour one another.]
Cause you're perfect. [There's a shuddery little tone in Jamie's voice, arching up into the nails against his back.] You're amazing, you're so-- fuck, you're beautiful.
[It's about a hair's breadth away from being nonsense, babbling adoration, but every bit of it is genuine. Everything he's saying is echoed in the emotions coming through, the strength of his admiration and his love as clear as his desire, and all of them only building.
He groans lowly against Max's mouth as he kisses him, returns it desperately, hips grinding down against him. Jamie's panting a little when he nods, swallows hard as he tries to find his voice again.] Yeah, yes, of course.
[His hands slide down immediately, obediently, to get Max's pants open. At the same time, Jamie bends to press a lingering, sucking kiss against Max's throat, shifting as he moves down to mouth his way down his torso, little bites and worshipful kisses. He only stops for a moment when he gets to the waistband of Max's pants, nuzzling another soft kiss there as he moves to tug his clothes down, leaning in to trace his tongue up the length of Max's cock as he gets it free.]
[As much as Max likes the more controlling position of sitting up and holding Jamie close in his lap-- it'd be nearly impossible for Jamie to remove his pants like this. With a sigh, he drops back into the pillows that line the top of their bed. Now that his thoughts are resting there, he can feel how uncomfortable the tight confines of his chosen jeans are. He never wears them loose and comfortable, always cowboy tight to show off his best assets. It's the only way he's ever known-- take a man out of the country, but near to impossible to drag his jeans or boots off him.
Feeling those fingers at his button and zipper, Max's hips surge upward of their own accord. He's eager and almost forcefully desperate to feel the touch of Jamie against his swollen cock. ]
Ooohhhh, baby. I love it when you touch me, when you kiss me near there.
[He inhales the words with a growl, making them come out deep from the back of his throat. Max loves the tiny bites and wonderful bits of worship from the younger male. He reaches out and slides his digits along Jamie's shoulder-- so broad and purposeful. He would make a grand swimmer with shoulders like those. So fucking perfect. Once he's naked, Max is about to pull Jamie up to him when Jamie runs his tongue along his wide cock. It shouldn't have been a surprise with them connected, but the pleasure runs an electrical current through them both, singing along their nerves with sensations of want and deep, deep desire, not only for more but to return the act all the same. It's an incredible cycle that turns Max on hard as it pings between them emotionally as well. ]
[It shouldn't really be easy to surprise someone connected this deeply -- but it maybe makes more sense when considering that Jamie only thinks first about what he's doing half the time. He's a creature of instinct in a lot of ways. And Max makes him feel comfortable enough acting on things that he doesn't even try to slow down and consider. If he makes a mistake, he's sure that Max will forgive him and let him make up for it. It's more safety than he's used to feeling with people, in bed or out of it.
The shared feeling goes straight through him, and Jamie muffles a moan against Max's thigh, kissing and then sucking hard at the skin, aiming to leave behind a dark spot of his own. A little reminder, just for the two of them. The possessiveness is usually quieter in Jamie, the desire to be claimed a lot stronger than the urge to stake one in return, but everything feels heightened right now. He wants, and he doesn't even really know what it is he wants. Just Max. Just this.
He nuzzles another kiss over the spot once he's done, hips shifting thoughtlessly to rub against the bed with another quiet noise.] Fuck. I love the way you taste. [Followed by another swipe of his tongue along his cock before he glances up, just wants to see Max's face.]
[There's no thought-out plan when Max is with Jamie; everything is empirical mixed with intense driving emotion-- It's all about what he can touch, taste, feel while exploring and diving into the entire universe that is Jamie. Max's body belongs to Jamie now, along with every single one of his emotions as overwhelming and fierce as they might be.
A rumble moves through Max's entire being when Jamie's mouth clamps down on his thigh. Max knows what he's doing and is desperate for it. His need is almost violent in want. Just as he wanted to devour Jamie, Max wants to be taken and devoured in the same manner. He feels that absolute desperation to know that he is wanted in the same way. It's horrible in its beauty. The deeper Jamie pulls against the skin, the louder Max becomes, moaning against the press of air above him.
Fingers dive into the short strands of Jamie's hair, and cling to his scalp. He lifts his head and then drops it back to the pillow when Jamie lifts his head with a profound sigh once the mark is created. Max knows that he'll work to keep it there for as long as he can, pressing into it for the next several days to come. ]
Jesus. I love it when you taste me. You're so damn amazing. Damn it, baby. I love you so much. [There's a pause leveled by a loud 'oh god' when Jamie's mouth laves one more stripe up along Max's cock. He thrusts his hips forward and groans loudly, obviously aching for more-- even if he was the one who was going to attack Jamie's body initally. He can't stop himself from wanting this, needing this. The feel of Jamie's mouth hot and warm against his heavily aching erection.]
[As far as Jamie's concerned, it doesn't matter who's attacking who, as long as the two of them are close enough to touch. Max drives him crazy, makes everything feel like more than it's ever been before, makes him feel like his whole body is lighting up with every touch. But he's just as eager to make his boyfriend feel as good as he possibly can. Besides the fact that making other people happy makes Jamie feel good about himself, and making Max happy feels like it might just be the most important thing he's ever done -- it's insanely hot, between the things Max says and the way he looks.
And that's just what there was before forging a magical connection that mean he can feel Max imprinted on his very soul. That intimacy just feeds into everything else.]
I love you. [Emphatic and full of emotion, spoken against the top of Max's thigh as he presses a kiss there. There's a groan in his voice, unbelievably turned on even though he's not being touched right now.] I love you, I love you, I love you-- [One for every kiss as he makes a path across Max's skin to suck another mark high against his hip.]
[Even the smallest of kisses is like a stone in the pond that's Max's body. It throws ripples along every neural pathway and projects a myriad of sensations that all pour and add upon one another until Max makes noises that he doesn't even recognize anymore. Knowing that Jamie is happy and feels good is injected into his mind, his body, his very being and Max feels like he wants to, no, needs to do more to make the emotion wider. He wants to open it up like the yawn of the Grand Canyon.
The new mark has Max arching up again with another incredibly loud moan. ] Yes. oh gods. I would tattoo that there if I could. I love you infinitely and then more.
[It feels like Max is running the highest height he could ever imagine. Sitting up a little, he pulls Jamie up to him and drags his mouth back so that they can kiss again. Max knew that he would dry up like the Sahara if he didn't have a taste of the younger male just then. He needed to nip, bite and tie their tounges together in that perfect dance between them. It's even better now, because they both can anticipate the other male's need, messy and wet.
Max's nails score lines along Jamie's back now that he has him close again, legs anchoring their bodies together so that Max can feel them together completely like they should be. He sighs and groans somehow all at once. ]
[He's already moving to meet Max when he reaches for him, and it's thrilling, to be able to meet him, to know him without words like this. Jamie already wants this forever, wants to always know Max like he knows his own limbs, wants to be able to give him everything he hasn't even asked for. Just wants, desperately, achingly, with every single cell in his body.
He whines into the kiss, hips rocking against Max, needy and seeking friction. One hand trails down his side until Jamie's fingers can press against that new mark, making sure the sensation doesn't have the slightest chance to fade.
He doesn't have words anymore, they slip away from him so easily and this is so much. Just noise, wordless and unrestrained, a desperate symphony of want and awe and adoration.]
[There's something about the way Jamie presses his fingers into the mark that has Max aching with a need that's limitless in its boundaries. Whatever had been between them before yawns open into something with a new ache. Max can feel the whines from Jamie before they ever leave his lips, and he's licking and sucking across the younger male's neck, leaving his own testament of love across those lean lines.
Unable to ignore the want, Max reaches for their lubricant and wets his fingers. Without preamble or thought, he slides his hand down and wraps it around Jamie's absolutely divine cock, feeling the pressure of it around his own. It's heady, and Max can't keep himself from panting while he slicks up the long, thick, erection. His fingers slip back from there, and one finds that tight small entrance.
Pressing a single digit inside has Max arching up against Jamie with a loud cry. It's been ages since anyone has had him, or touched him in that way and their connection allows him to feel a portion of what Jamie feels, and even in part it still rips through Max in a way that unites him and Jamie together forever with a bond that Max will never forget. ]
[He's halfway surprised it's not enough to tip him over already, those perfect marks against his neck and Max's hand around him and the thrilling new echo of Max's desire feeding his own. It has him squirming already before Max's finger works inside him, and his cry is a mirror, the secondary echo of the other's pleasure hitting in a way that makes his stomach drop.]
Love you, love you. [Mumbled, flushed and panting against Max's shoulder as Jamie hides his face there for a moment. He says it like it's a mantra, a way to gather himself together, before pressing a kiss and then a bite into the flesh in front of him.
He only ever seems to make requests when it comes to sex (or anything, really) when he's too overwhelmed to keep the words in, and he babbles softly, pressing kisses into Max's neck:] Next time, another time, I could -- if you wanted me to, you could let me fuck you? [It's clearly a request born out of Max's reaction to even just the echo of it, but the desire the idea sends through Jamie is clear, too. He wants Max in every way he can have him.]
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carisma_sensei
no subject
Date: 2024-12-12 09:16 pm (UTC)[Jamie doesn't bother to answer -- everything he wants to say, he'd rather say in person. He throws himself into finishing off anything that might be asked of him instead, making sure that as soon as possible after the clock strikes, he can be let off.
It's a jittery ride home, followed by a brief jog from the bus stop down the street. Jamie's a little disheveled by the time he lets himself in, work clothes in disarray from his impatient fidgeting -- tie hanging loose instead of fully undone, cuffs unbuttoned, collar half-up and half-down. He doesn't really care enough to fix it, or even to immediately go to change the way he normally would, seeking out Max instead to get his arms around him, words falling out quick and certain:] Hi. I love you.
no subject
Date: 2024-12-12 10:22 pm (UTC)Now, there was no hesitance at all. This was their apartment, and there should never be a reason why Jamie didn't feel comfortable coming home to him.
Seeing Jamie so flushed and what looked like.. picked apart had Max changing his opinion about standing. He started to move and made it to the other side of the counter before he was in Jamie's arms, hands instantly tugging at his shirt so his fingers could rest against his lover's flesh. ]
Hey there. I love you too, so fucking much. I love you. I love you. I love you. I don't know why I was so scared to say it, but I do. I have, and I will.
no subject
Date: 2024-12-12 10:51 pm (UTC)[That it was too much, coming from him. That he wasn't going to be enough. Max has been so good, so kind, so clear about how much he cares, but some things go deeper than that. Jamie's used to bending over backwards for people and still being told it's not enough. And what has he done for Max? What could he do for Max, who has things so much more together than Jamie can ever imagine being despite having a hundred more reasons not to?
But none of that matters. Max has opened his home and his heart and shared all his secrets. It's hard to keep wondering for long. Jamie might worry about being worth it, but he doesn't have any doubts about it being true.]
But I love you. Fuck, I really, really love you. [He's almost breathless with in, one hand on Max's cheek, the other against his back, holding him in close.]
no subject
Date: 2024-12-13 05:57 pm (UTC)[Because that's what it boils down to. There's a visceral need. It's something beyond natural and human that's basic and feral almost, that boils down Max's need and desire to be with Jamie to an almost unhealthy degree. He feels it in his bones, through his blood and body. It makes him ache to always touch, to be close and the actual desire he feels consumes him like nothing else. It's a cracking electricity that runs through him, a force he wishes he knew how to control, but doesn't want to all the same.
This is why Max is worried his love will consume Jamie. He doesn't understand it himself, but he knows that he'd shatter without the young man already. Jamie is worth it all to Max and there's nothing Max wouldn't do or give for him.
Max moves his hands along Jamie's back and sides and places one hand over his heart. ]
I want you to feel my love. I want you to know. I was going to wait until we were having sex one day, but this- I want you to know how much, how deep I need you, what this is inside me.
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Date: 2024-12-13 06:15 pm (UTC)[If he's waiting for any fear or hesitance, Max won't find it. Jamie's expression is open, eager, a hand dropping to cover Max's and hold it against his chest. He's not afraid of the idea of being needed too much. It doesn't feel possible, at this point. Imagining a life without Max has quickly become, if not impossible, then too painful to let himself linger on. Being needed just means Max will stay.]
Please. [The sheer want in Jamie's voice is unmistakable, longing and hopeful. He smiles at Max, leaning in to rest his forehead against the other's.] I want it too, baby. I want to feel everything I can from you.
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Date: 2024-12-14 01:43 am (UTC)[Wanting this to be intimate and knowing that it will be powerful and full of energy for them both, Max takes a moment to remove both their shirts. He pulls Jamie back to the bedroom and smiles softly as he brings him to their bed. It's easier to experience this the first time when the focus isn't split.
Max hasn't let go of Jamie's hands or body the entire time they've moved-- he hasn't broken eye contact either. Even with the tide-like inundations he knows that Jamie will experience, he's feeling increasingly secure in what they have. ]
You have all the choice, and I will never push you away. I will renew this mark as often as you want to keep you connected to me. It lasts about a week but will begin to fade after a few days. My emotions won't be as strong after a little while, but if we continually renew it, you will begin to sense what I feel almost all the time. It will be a bond between us. I can detect you, too, but not as strongly unless we are being intimate. It's ... a lot while we are having sex. That's the best I can describe it until you feel it yourself. I mean, imagine both our orgasms at once, along with all our feelings. I want you to realize what you're getting. I want this with you, want it so much, but I need you to make sure.
[There's a sureness in Max's tone. He knows that Jamie wants this, but it's his entire being that he's giving, and Max has done this before and has been burned so badly. He knows that Jamie isn't like that, but he also wants to give Jamie an understanding of how much he will feel because Max hasn't felt this way in so long, and once they are joined, Max will love even more deeply. They both will because they will feel their wills combine. ]
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Date: 2024-12-14 02:18 am (UTC)It only takes him a moment of consideration to answer, and even that's only because it feels like it should.]
I'm sure. I promise.
[There's so much trust in the way he's looking at Max. Jamie runs a hand down his arm, his side, trying to soothe away any concern that might be there.]
Being connected to you -- I don't think I've ever wanted anything more than that.
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Date: 2024-12-14 06:15 pm (UTC)Taking a deep breath, Max nods and quietly places his hand on Jamie's chest over his heart. Closing his eyes, his hand glows red briefly, and then suddenly Jamie will feel the flood of Max's emotions, a tidal wave of everything he's feeling. The dangerous, overwhelming desire, want, need, possessive, and slightly obsessive nature of his love. He will know exactly how deeply Max feels. It's a never-ending well of emotion, a powerful, soul-wrenching, almost painful love that Max has no idea how to keep a lid on. It's beautiful and terrible all at once. It's powerful, and his hand will leave behind a irradescent mark that will tie them together.
After the initial wash, the intensity will mute into something more natural if Jamie allows it to if he accepts what Max feels. When Max's eyes flutter open, there's a slight fear in them, knowing that Jamie can feel all he does. Something about being who he is has made his true love like this. Although this is the first time he's fallen this deeply, he thinks. That, too, can be felt -- everything that Max feels, Jamie will know now. Pain and joy, fear, trepidation, happiness, love, all of it is for Jamie to know. Max holds no more secrets between them. ]
Are, are you okay?
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Date: 2024-12-14 07:14 pm (UTC)It's overwhelming, but Jamie's still not scared in the slightest. He could get addicted to this rush of emotion, this complete openness. Wishes he could reach out and show Max a mirror into his own mind, just to truly, completely melt them together.
He's not sure when his eyes have drifted closed, too busy sorting through what's happening in his own head to pay attention. The only outside stimuli that gets through is Max's hand against his skin, Max's voice when he speaks. It doesn't matter. He doesn't have to see that little tremor of fear; he can feel it in his own chest.
Jamie doesn't bother to open his eyes, not immediately, and he doesn't have the words to explain exactly how it feels. He reaches out, instead, hands finding Max as instinctively as a compass finds north, tugging him in close so Jamie can kiss him instead, try to pour all the love and all the desire he's feeling into it, desperate to try to show him the only way he knows.]
I love you. [It's breathless, awed, murmured almost still against Max's mouth.] I love you, I love you -- thank you.
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Date: 2024-12-14 08:33 pm (UTC)His hands run along Jamie's chest and upward into his hair, tugging at it lightly as they kiss. He can feel the chords of their passion beating out a unique and gorgeous tune that only they could make together. It all begins to make sense to him: the need, the passion. They share it, and while Max still doesn't know if what he feels is comfortable. He can't stop himself. His need is complete, and it's all-consuming. Knowing that Jamie can feel everything makes it easier -- Max doesn't have to speak. He knows his movements are understood, and the flames of his desire are known.
Even the fact that he's beginning to feel what Jamie does is echoed in his emotions. It's like a never-ending cycle that curls through them both, only adding to the intensity they feel together. ]
I love you too, I love you, want you, need you. You are my home, my everything. Thank you!
[Biting at Jamie's lower lip, Max lingers over the taste of copper that he uncovers. It's a taste of Jamie's soul, of something forbidden that he shouldn't enjoy, and he knows it. If Jamie wants to complain, he'd understand. He'd feel it and know that it wouldn't be acceptable. He'd know that Jamie wouldn't want the same in return. Max has needs that want to take and give all at once, he could swallow down Jamie whole somehow. Take his being, and drink it, bathe in it, live in it. It's about being together and being one like this that drives Max to the extreme of his emotions. He loves to the very corners of his mind, soul and body. ]
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Date: 2024-12-14 09:12 pm (UTC)He's never felt this wanted before. He's never wanted anyone this way before. He feels drunk on it.]
You're mine, too. [Another kiss, deep and desperate.] My whole world. You've got me.
[Jamie says it like it's an offering, means it like one. He'd give Max anything he wanted, he'd do anything he was asked. If Max wants to devour him, that's okay -- Jamie wants to be consumed just as much.]
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Date: 2024-12-14 10:22 pm (UTC)His hands wander Jamie's perfect dancer form, carving beautiful lines with his digits across the planes of his chest and along his abdomen. Then he moves back up to trace the handprint he left delicately. Then, without much thought, Max bows down to trace it with his tongue. ]
I will always be yours.
[He looks up from where he is and continues to move down slowly. His mouth pays testament to the perfectly honed definition of Jamie's abs, running his tongue back and forth in long stripes until Max reaches the area right above Jamie's pants. He sucks up a bit of skin and bites down around it, pulling it up deep into his mouth. He'd swallow it down whole if he could. He almost does but then releases it to a dark mark and a long groan. ]
Fuck, I love you. I need you so much right now.
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Date: 2024-12-14 11:17 pm (UTC)The mark sends a little spike of heat through him, always does. It would be embarrassing knowing how laid bare Jamie's wants are, that Max is seeing how desperately he loves that feeling of being claimed and owned that those marks give him -- except feeling Max's possessiveness for himself tells Jamie that he has nothing to feel ashamed about.]
Please-- [It comes out as a helpless little moan, and he swallows, one hand dropping to Max's shoulder just to sweep over whatever of his skin Jamie can reach, running down over his arm.] I love you, please. Whatever you want.
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Date: 2024-12-15 09:27 pm (UTC)Lapping over the small trail that leads directly to Jamie's cock, Max quickly undoes Jamie's button and zipper so that he can mouth along his beloved's thick cock. It makes his body throb with need and burn with pleasure all at once as he feels the pleasure and needs flood through Jamie at his touch.]
Oh Fuck, you're wonderful.
[Pulling off the rest of Jamie's clothes, Max quickly lays him bare. He takes a moment to climb back up his body to kiss him full and hard on the mouth. The kiss is full of tongue, a dirty, thrusting mess that's half in his mouth and half out. Rubbing his body up against Jamie's, Max groans. Even though he's still half-clothed, he can feel Jamie's cock against his stomach and can't wait to fulfill the ache he has to taste every bit of him. ]
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Date: 2024-12-15 10:08 pm (UTC)He arches up into Max, kisses him with a fervor, mouth opening immediately under his. One hand settles at Max's shoulder, a leg hitching up around his waist. Jamie arches up into him, simply seeking friction for a moment before he shifts, moving with a sudden and playful instinct to flip the both of them over, straddling Max's hips as he presses him down into the mattress. He bends down to kiss him again, biting at Max's lip, hands all over his chest, reverential in his touches. It doesn't matter that he knows Max can feel all that Jamie feels for him -- it doesn't stop him from wanting to show him how much he's loved, too.]
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Date: 2024-12-16 07:10 pm (UTC)Jesus, you are so fucking gorgeous. How did I manage you?
[Still wearing pants, he can't find the exact friction he seeks, but that doesn't keep him from rolling his hips up toward Jamie. There's always that impending sensation coming that will echo his action from Jamie's body. It's a wealth of information and exploding friction in his brain from every touch, every nip and pull between them. It's nothing he's felt in years-- and never to this degree.
Moans and low growls merely exist in the room like they were pulled from the corners, the ceiling, the bed themselves as they travel from Max and reverberate around. He's far from silent about how he feels. There's an ache that continues to pulse and drive Max upward until he's captured Jamie's mouth in a long, biting kiss, sitting up-- his arms around Jamie, clinging to every inch of him as they devour one another.]
Undo my pants. Please.
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Date: 2024-12-16 08:11 pm (UTC)[It's about a hair's breadth away from being nonsense, babbling adoration, but every bit of it is genuine. Everything he's saying is echoed in the emotions coming through, the strength of his admiration and his love as clear as his desire, and all of them only building.
He groans lowly against Max's mouth as he kisses him, returns it desperately, hips grinding down against him. Jamie's panting a little when he nods, swallows hard as he tries to find his voice again.] Yeah, yes, of course.
[His hands slide down immediately, obediently, to get Max's pants open. At the same time, Jamie bends to press a lingering, sucking kiss against Max's throat, shifting as he moves down to mouth his way down his torso, little bites and worshipful kisses. He only stops for a moment when he gets to the waistband of Max's pants, nuzzling another soft kiss there as he moves to tug his clothes down, leaning in to trace his tongue up the length of Max's cock as he gets it free.]
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Date: 2024-12-17 09:04 pm (UTC)Feeling those fingers at his button and zipper, Max's hips surge upward of their own accord. He's eager and almost forcefully desperate to feel the touch of Jamie against his swollen cock. ]
Ooohhhh, baby. I love it when you touch me, when you kiss me near there.
[He inhales the words with a growl, making them come out deep from the back of his throat. Max loves the tiny bites and wonderful bits of worship from the younger male. He reaches out and slides his digits along Jamie's shoulder-- so broad and purposeful. He would make a grand swimmer with shoulders like those. So fucking perfect. Once he's naked, Max is about to pull Jamie up to him when Jamie runs his tongue along his wide cock. It shouldn't have been a surprise with them connected, but the pleasure runs an electrical current through them both, singing along their nerves with sensations of want and deep, deep desire, not only for more but to return the act all the same. It's an incredible cycle that turns Max on hard as it pings between them emotionally as well. ]
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Date: 2024-12-17 10:06 pm (UTC)The shared feeling goes straight through him, and Jamie muffles a moan against Max's thigh, kissing and then sucking hard at the skin, aiming to leave behind a dark spot of his own. A little reminder, just for the two of them. The possessiveness is usually quieter in Jamie, the desire to be claimed a lot stronger than the urge to stake one in return, but everything feels heightened right now. He wants, and he doesn't even really know what it is he wants. Just Max. Just this.
He nuzzles another kiss over the spot once he's done, hips shifting thoughtlessly to rub against the bed with another quiet noise.] Fuck. I love the way you taste. [Followed by another swipe of his tongue along his cock before he glances up, just wants to see Max's face.]
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Date: 2024-12-20 07:05 pm (UTC)A rumble moves through Max's entire being when Jamie's mouth clamps down on his thigh. Max knows what he's doing and is desperate for it. His need is almost violent in want. Just as he wanted to devour Jamie, Max wants to be taken and devoured in the same manner. He feels that absolute desperation to know that he is wanted in the same way. It's horrible in its beauty. The deeper Jamie pulls against the skin, the louder Max becomes, moaning against the press of air above him.
Fingers dive into the short strands of Jamie's hair, and cling to his scalp. He lifts his head and then drops it back to the pillow when Jamie lifts his head with a profound sigh once the mark is created. Max knows that he'll work to keep it there for as long as he can, pressing into it for the next several days to come. ]
Jesus. I love it when you taste me. You're so damn amazing. Damn it, baby. I love you so much. [There's a pause leveled by a loud 'oh god' when Jamie's mouth laves one more stripe up along Max's cock. He thrusts his hips forward and groans loudly, obviously aching for more-- even if he was the one who was going to attack Jamie's body initally. He can't stop himself from wanting this, needing this. The feel of Jamie's mouth hot and warm against his heavily aching erection.]
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Date: 2024-12-20 11:47 pm (UTC)And that's just what there was before forging a magical connection that mean he can feel Max imprinted on his very soul. That intimacy just feeds into everything else.]
I love you. [Emphatic and full of emotion, spoken against the top of Max's thigh as he presses a kiss there. There's a groan in his voice, unbelievably turned on even though he's not being touched right now.] I love you, I love you, I love you-- [One for every kiss as he makes a path across Max's skin to suck another mark high against his hip.]
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Date: 2024-12-22 06:20 pm (UTC)The new mark has Max arching up again with another incredibly loud moan. ] Yes. oh gods. I would tattoo that there if I could. I love you infinitely and then more.
[It feels like Max is running the highest height he could ever imagine. Sitting up a little, he pulls Jamie up to him and drags his mouth back so that they can kiss again. Max knew that he would dry up like the Sahara if he didn't have a taste of the younger male just then. He needed to nip, bite and tie their tounges together in that perfect dance between them. It's even better now, because they both can anticipate the other male's need, messy and wet.
Max's nails score lines along Jamie's back now that he has him close again, legs anchoring their bodies together so that Max can feel them together completely like they should be. He sighs and groans somehow all at once. ]
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Date: 2024-12-22 06:49 pm (UTC)He whines into the kiss, hips rocking against Max, needy and seeking friction. One hand trails down his side until Jamie's fingers can press against that new mark, making sure the sensation doesn't have the slightest chance to fade.
He doesn't have words anymore, they slip away from him so easily and this is so much. Just noise, wordless and unrestrained, a desperate symphony of want and awe and adoration.]
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Date: 2024-12-24 10:50 pm (UTC)Unable to ignore the want, Max reaches for their lubricant and wets his fingers. Without preamble or thought, he slides his hand down and wraps it around Jamie's absolutely divine cock, feeling the pressure of it around his own. It's heady, and Max can't keep himself from panting while he slicks up the long, thick, erection. His fingers slip back from there, and one finds that tight small entrance.
Pressing a single digit inside has Max arching up against Jamie with a loud cry. It's been ages since anyone has had him, or touched him in that way and their connection allows him to feel a portion of what Jamie feels, and even in part it still rips through Max in a way that unites him and Jamie together forever with a bond that Max will never forget. ]
Oh fuck, Jamie. Fuck, I love that. I love you.
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Date: 2024-12-24 11:18 pm (UTC)Love you, love you. [Mumbled, flushed and panting against Max's shoulder as Jamie hides his face there for a moment. He says it like it's a mantra, a way to gather himself together, before pressing a kiss and then a bite into the flesh in front of him.
He only ever seems to make requests when it comes to sex (or anything, really) when he's too overwhelmed to keep the words in, and he babbles softly, pressing kisses into Max's neck:] Next time, another time, I could -- if you wanted me to, you could let me fuck you? [It's clearly a request born out of Max's reaction to even just the echo of it, but the desire the idea sends through Jamie is clear, too. He wants Max in every way he can have him.]
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